8 Ways to Model a Healthy Relationship to Your Children



With over exposure to internet and social media these days, we need to be careful what role modelling our children receive. Our children are our future leaders and more now than ever, we need to instill solid values from which they can base their decision making on.


Teaching these values must begin in the home. Too many parents are giving away their responsibility in educating their children, believing that their children will learn all they need to know at school.


Children learn best by observation. Monkey see, monkey do. No doubt, as a parent, you have heard and seen yourself in your children, sometimes in such a way that we are forced to re-evaluate our own behaviour.


As sponges, absorbing all that they see, it is vital that you take your role modelling as a parent very seriously. Take time to reflect upon your own values and ensure that these are forming the foundation of how you make decisions in your home. Your child/ren will see this and should then decide upon whether they feel these values will serve them in their life.

With regard to relationships, the values and role modelling here is paramount. The relationships our children witness us in, are going to be the relationships that they create and accept for themselves. For the purpose of this article, let us focus on intimate relationships.

What you choose to tolerate, or not, in your relationship, will be what your child/ren will normalise and likely copy in their future relationship/s. Therefore, it is vital to model a healthy relationship to your child/ren:


1. Equality is an important part of all relationships. There must be give and take and both partners need to respect the other as their equal.


2. Children learn to be dishonest if we are dishonest with our partner. Honesty is such an important component of a healthy relationship.


3. If our children witness us in healthy relationships, they will understand the concept of self-worth, ensuring they strive to form healthy relationships also.


4. By understanding that we all have free choice and the ability to make our own decisions, children will learn independence and self-reliance.


5. If you can take responsibility for your actions, children will understand the concept of accountability, how their actions impact other’s reactions and the importance of this.


6. By not judging your partner, children learn the art of humility and will grow into kind adults.


7. Choosing to share your life with another, teaches your child of compromise and sacrifice, which are such important tools in life.


8. Staying in a long-term relationship in today’s day and age is not easy, if you continuously work at your relationship and grow together, you teach your child/ren the importance of self-growth and always bettering yourself.


Relationships take work and perseverance, but most of all they need to be based on love and acceptance. We need to continuously work on our intimate relationships and demonstrate to our children the highs, as well as the lows, whilst maintaining a high standard of what we will accept and how we choose to be treated. This will ensure that our future generation will have the tools they need to navigate the complex realm of relationships!

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