Baby Body Gratitude!
As a person who has always battled with controlling my body weight, falling pregnant has been quite the journey.
Years ago, I had convinced myself that I would be the pregnant woman who would put on lots of weight/fluid and prepared myself for the worst. My own mother was weight obsessed and I have had hormonal issues for as long as I can remember resulting in fluctuating weight my entire adult life.
I went back to uni to study nutrition, as it had always fascinated me as there is not one hard and fast rule that fits everyone when it comes to finding the perfect diet.
Thankfully I have never been so weight obsessed that it developed into an eating disorder, but I have always wanted, to stabilise at my ideal weight. I have focused my efforts on living a healthy, physically active, low tox lifestyle, so never did I ever expect to fall pregnant and actually lose weight!
I have shared this before outlining how it appears pregnancy has balanced out my hormones. But now as I near ever closer to baby’s arrival earth side the predicament I find myself in, when people ask how my pregnancy is going, I have nothing but good to report and this leaves me feeling the need to justify myself.
Why do I feel that my normalising weight, despite being pregnant requires explanation? Why have I struggled to be truly grateful and embrace my body’s transformation during this phase? Why can I not be more embracing of the fact that I still fit into most of my pre-pregnancy clothes?
Isn’t it funny how we can spend years wishing that our body were some other way and then when we get there in a sense, still struggle to appreciate ourselves in all of our imperfect perfection?! Don’t get me wrong. I am super grateful for how well my body has adapted to pregnancy and how strong and able I still feel at 34 weeks. However, a part of me feels guilty as I have heard and shared in the struggle of fellow mammas who haven’t had such an easy ride through their pregnancy.
I therefore feel the need to downplay my body’s ability, in fear of seeming like I’m boasting or making it seem like I have had the easiest pregnancy to date! Further to this, a work colleague planted a seed saying, “easy on the inside, hard on the outside.” So now I feel myself preparing for the worst once baby arrives which is also so ridiculous.
My baby brain babble aside, I think the point I’m trying to make here is that we all deserve to enjoy, the experience we have. Each of us has a unique journey and we shouldn’t feel the need to explain, justify or play it down in fear of offending others. I am proud of my body and I am beyond excited to meet (on the outside) this little spirit who has chosen us as parents.
I choose to celebrate this time of my life and, whilst I’ll remain realistic, drop any need to makes excuses for the situation I’m in as I have truly worked hard over the years to get here.
